Shaded Heart

Across fields of golden grain I see her
walking, or marching, down this aisle of Fate.
Gracefully she moves as a timeless specter
or some ethereal beauty yet unseen.

Her scarlet dress dances under harvest moon
as I sing to her whispers of endless song;
Those amber strands anoint her supple face,
deservingly crowning her august head.

My arms yearn to touch her tender hands
and my legs itch to drag me to her feet.
My heart dreams to simply watch her smile
and to gaze endlessly in those cerise eyes.

Yet, I remain motionless and silent;
my limbs imprisoned by some insidious fate;
my voice stricken by some soulless warden.
The crows overhead mock my imposition.

On opposite glass I see her walking
silently past my life; a graceful ghost
floating slowly as if searching, wanting,
haunting this dilapidated soul.

Her face is golden and her skin
inviting to palms moist with tears.
Lifeless veils cover her pleading eyes
and guard closely that perilous path.

Suddenly, she turns her face toward me
glancing, her mouth opening so slightly,
as if a lover had whispered her name
or stroked those ebony strands.

I stand frozen, immobilized as her silhouette
burns against my unrelenting desire.
My mind races for one brazen act in life
as she smiles softly at her timely reflection.

In the essence of a moment,
shade and brilliance meet.
Intertwined into such beauty:
the aura of a soul.

The stillness pursues
where loss and gain ceases
and a dim light shines
warming this shaded heart.

In this silent surrender
perfect love knows no other.
So death and life are one;
collectively this heart.

A thought is born
from memories of love
as angel’s tears spread
filling this star-lit sky.

Silence induces thought
Images of a distant love
Conquer my feeble heart
And I submit to life

Awake but still dreaming
Always at the thought of you
Until forever finds an end
Such is my love for you

Torn inside a moment
Heaven and hell collide
Expect no compromise
Yet still a hint of hope

Sleep wanders around me
And dreams seduce my heart
If all was lost briefly
Only then could I gain it all

Breathe. Taking in the air
Silent intoxication here
Streaming through my veins
Bleeding out my tears
A forced sigh of discomfort

Speak. Nothing to be said
An evil silence spreads
Dying slowly to myself
Trying not to think aloud
Another second creeps on by

Feel. Numbness takes control
A pain that killed a soul
Escaping through my hands
Taping up the wounds
The dark consumes the fire

Die. Struggle for the life
This long and lonely strife
Crying to gods not there
Fearing what a moment brings
My heart never feels a beat

The day gives way to darker heir
And I struggle with the thought
Violent games play inside my head
You’re there too, standing silent

I brace myself for the impact
And it has hit but I haven’t moved
Still pretending you’re there
Still wishing you weren’t gone

Awoke to the warmth of the sun
But my heart is solid ice now
Slowly cracking and breaking
And I can do nothing but watch

Now we go about our days
With those feelings ignored
And my love is replaced with hate
Don’t let this be the end

You’ll leave all the same
And I’ll cry and forget you
Then you’ll come running back
But I’ll already be gone

As I sit surrounded by strangers
A find myself dreaming of far away places
And wishing every breath wasn’t our last
Searching for an answer to an unknown question

I’m torn between these worlds
Of reality and surrealism
And I’m lost between you and me
Trapped within a void of hate

And I dare to dream of you
Your beauty hits me like the sun
Following even in my darkest recess
An image that is never gone

I cannot tell day from night
I drink the water that is sand
Slowly choking my love away
Until my heart stops beating

I turn to my enemies in disguise
And outreach my hand with a plea
And the silent condemnation tolls
And once again I am alone

In this quiet suppression
I slowly begin to fade
Muffled by the darkness
Eventually life is paid

A tear shatters the silence
Of what you thought was real
Engulfed in my own sorrows
No longer want to feel

The morrow proves no better
I’m better left behind
Falling out of myself
To never again find

But you could have it all
The nothingness I hold
I won’t keep it from you
My life is already sold

Voices cry out with pity
They run within my ears
They could never understand
They’ll never know my tears